Be you, bravely

Two weeks ago I would have left Botswana. Forty degree heat without air con, sorting out my feelings over a man, and wondering why I think being far from family during festive season is such a brilliant idea…

My life is so circumstantial sometimes – my decisions feel so based on weather, or relationships, or whether I can get a decent cup of coffee.

So life feels negative, and I can’t seem to get over that energy. I start beating myself up over decisions, bringing up the past. It takes courage to work through, to get beyond the negative. Courage I don’t think I have the strength to muster.

I went to my mat. I needed to surrender. To take deep breaths.

I went to a place where I was forced to meditate and pray. Forced to stretch myself beyond what I ever thought possible.

I read this and it felt so true:

“Often it’s a struggle just to get on our yoga mats. And there are moments we struggle once we get there. Some days it is a wrestling match of the mind. Other times it is a wrestling match of the body. And the only way to liberate this so-called struggle is to soften and surrender. Savasana is taking all of that work and just letting it be. Allowing it to reabsorb into us. It is the taking and acceptance of the final fruit of our efforts. (The Girl Who Hated Savasana)”

Today, when I was doing a back bend, resting only on the crown of my head and the tips of my toes. I crossed my arms and smiled, releasing all of the negative emotions.

My yoga practice has allowed me the privilege to see that  I am strong, I can do the impossible, and even when I struggle or it doesn’t feel right: I will get it, trusting my body and my mind.

Isn’t that it? Finding the courage inside of myself, to surrender to that.

Bravery isn’t only for the superheroes…

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8 comments

  1. Quinn Barreth (@Bar_Qu)

    CS Lewis once said – “I didn’t go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity.”

    Which is why I always cringe (internally now) when someone says “i just want you to be happy”. Seriously, happy is a good night’s sleep, a fine breakfast and a slow morning.

    Peace is harder to reach and lasts through trauma, pain and desperation. Job modeled it, so did Jesus. I recommend peace as pursuit. Glad you are finding that place. Even temporarily.

  2. Chelsea Mason

    Love it and love you! Sounds like you’re going through some tough, but great stuff. You really need to do a yoga teacher training!

  3. Joanne

    Well, you know I am looking up quotes for Ted’s Tribute that he will be delivering. I read your blog during that time, and came upon these quotes:
    “Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.”― Ernest Hemingway
    “You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.”― Jonathan Safran Foer
    “The only way to find true happiness is to risk being completely cut open.”
    ― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters
    “The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware”. – Henry Miller
    “Many people think excitement is happiness…. But when you are excited you are not peaceful. True happiness is based on peace.”
    ― Thich Nhat Hanh, The Art of Power
    “People usually consider walking on water or in thin air a miracle. But I think the real miracle is not to walk either on water or in thin air, but to walk on earth. Every day we are engaged in a miracle which we don’t even recognize: a blue sky, white clouds, green leaves, the black, curious eyes of a child — our own two eyes. All is a miracle. – Thich Nhat Hanh
    “Our notions about happiness entrap us. We forget that they are just ideas. Our idea of happiness can prevent us from actually being happy. We fail to see the opportunity for joy that is right in front of us when we are caught in a belief that happiness should take a particular form.” Thich Nhat Hanh
    My quote: “I kinda like ‘Thay'” (pronounced “Thai”) – Thich Nhat Hanh’s nickname.

    • Sheila

      Like being spammed by inspirational quotes – lol thanks Joanne, will most definitely mull these ones over. Love you!

      • Joanne

        Ha! Inspirational Spam, indeed! Ha! I was on a roll that day, getting quotes for that eulogy…So, read one for each day of the week – (aren’t you glad there are only 7 days???) 🙂

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